Chocolate? Perfume? Jewellery? Are you holding your breath waiting for the usual barrage of female orientated gifts, knowing that you probably won’t receive what you put on your list this year? Hey, we’re not saying that these things aren’t great. We count chocolate as one of our five a day – cocoa does come from a plant after all.

When it comes to Christmas though, you could get ready to don your gracious ‘gift face’ or politely pass the pressie on to someone else next year (maybe M&S will be hosting another Shwop Drop?) But before you give-up on opening the perfect present, take some inspiration from the wish list below, write out your own and stick it on the fridge:

Dear Santa,

All I want for Christmas is:

1. To be (a slimmer version of) the chubby guy in the red suit – he gets all the credit, plus 364 days of the year off work!
2. For my little one to be the lead in the Christmas play – as long as I don’t have to make the costume!
3. To know who’s got me gifts – so I can return the favour with no awkward, ‘oh yours is still in the post’ moments.
4. To see this from my nearest and dearest:

Dear Santa,

[  ] I’ve been really good this year.

[  ] Okay, some of the time.

[X] Never mind. I’ll buy my own gifts.

5. To have all my Christmas shopping wrapped up by the 23rd – no frantic dashing around the shops on Christmas Eve, thank you!
6. To remember to defrost the turkey at least 24 hours before the day.
7. A Christmas miracle – which basically consists of last year’s party outfit fitting.
8. To eat, drink and be merry – and for someone else to do the washing-up.
9. A day off – especially at Christmas.
10. A Christmas elf or two – who wouldn’t?

All things considered, there’s only one secret to being an amazing gift giver: make the present special. So put down the chocolates. Step away from that toiletry set and think about what really matters: diamonds. And to all the nay sayers out there – size does matter!

So with this wish list in mind, what would be number one in your letter to Santa?